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Iron Man Knows Who Superman Is

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Iron Man: Your phasing through them shorted out all the circuitry? Kitty Pryde: Yeah. Happens with any electrical system. And if you’re wearing it, it’s wicked painful. Iron Man: So for me, having… Continue reading

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Kitty Pryde Hacks Into Avengers Database

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Iron Man: And we both know that you’ve hacked routinely hacked into the Avengers database whenever you’ve needed info. Kitty Pryde: That wasn’t me. Iron Man: Really? Who was it, then? Kitty Pryde:… Continue reading

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Martha, Jonathan and Superman

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Martha: But you’re still worried. Jonathan: Well, I have to admit he’s done a good job of stayn’ out of sight, but– Superman: Of course I’m staying out of sight, pa. Look what… Continue reading

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The Flash Convinces Cyborg He’s Still Human

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Flash: You’re not a robot, Vic. Robots don’t laugh at jokes or talk about their favorite television shows or worry that they’re robots. Do you ever fantasize about making out with a toaster?… Continue reading

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Sayd’s First Impression Of Kyle Rayner

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Sayd: Greetings, brother Ganthet. Kyle Rayner: A girl guardian! Sweet! Sayd: Is this one mentally impaired? Ganthet: No, Sayd. He is from planet Earth, like Jordan, Stewart… Sayd: … And Gardner. That explains… Continue reading

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Emma Frost’s Idea For A Reward

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Armor: I only hit this one in the head once, Miss Frost. Emma Frost: Hisako, you are such a good girl. I think a shopping trip as a reward, when we get home?… Continue reading

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Agent Brand’s Advice For A Happy Relationship

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Agent Brand: Hank. Behave. Beast: Yes, dear. Agent Brand: The key to a happy relationship. Establish early on who’s boss. – Astonishing X-Men Vol. 3 #42

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Is Wolverine Being Ironic or Hypocritical?

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Armor: What are you doing here? This is my test. Wolverine: X-men are a team, Armor. An’ we fight as a team. Magneto: Hmm…Coming as it does from Wolverine of all people, would… Continue reading

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Wolverine Hits Old People

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Storm: Logan! Beast: Good God man! Wolverine: What? Beast: He’s in his sixties! You can’t just– Wolverine: Hey! Wheelchair of death here! Armor: He switched it off! Wolverine: We don’t know what else… Continue reading

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Emma Frost Approves of Swearing

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Beast Likes The Word Girlfriend

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Agent Brand: If I say it’s S.W.O.R.D. business, then that’s exactly what it is, one-eye– Cyclops: I swear to you, I will cut your head off and hide the ****ing body if that’s… Continue reading

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Blame The Beer

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Storm: I said you were heavy. Armor: It’s the beer. Wolverine: Shaddap. – Astonishing X-Men Vol. 3 #26

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If Wolverine Came Up With The Code Names

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Armor: Oh, I couldn’t sleep. I need a new X-name. Beast: This again? Armor: Logan keeps making fun or “Armor.” I’m really tired, Dr. Mccoy. Beast: We’ll get you some coffee. And you… Continue reading

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Wolverine Can Speak Japanese

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Armor: *It’s really shameful that a killer gorilla passes as teacher here. Wolverine: *Since you do nothing but complain, aren’t you shaming your ancestors? Armor: I’m never gonna make X-man. *Japanese – Astonishing… Continue reading

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Where Washed Up X-Men Are Transferred

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Wolverine: Kid… You’re fired. We get back to Earth, you’re demoted to Excalisuck or some damn team. Armor: They were lining up civilians! To kill them! Wolverine: That ain’t the mission. Armor: Have… Continue reading

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